I Think I'm Finally Getting It....

So, today was a really good day. It was beautiful outside. I'm still pretty sick, but I was able to workout a little and that felt good. I made lots and lots of follow-up phone calls for my Ghana support raising. God is amazing!! I left a lot of messages, but the people that I was able to catch were so excited and I could tell God had allowed them to share in my passion for Africa. I had a handful of people commit to supporting me financially today, and I still have so many people to talk to and so many more letters to send out. I have been praying so hard for the people I am sending letters to and I know God is speaking to their hearts. Another reason I'm happy is because I went out for dinner and coffee with a group of friends last night that I hadn't hung out with in quite a while. I had so much fun and I laughed so hard that my abs were sore today. I needed that so much. I can' t remember the last time I laughed that hard; I had actually almost forgotten how much I love to laugh. One of my friends that came along snorts when she laughs...well, it makes me laugh even harder, and then she laughs and snorts louder...needless to say, I'm sure that restaurant was ready for us to leave!

After a couple of rough nights last week, I went to Borders and browsed the Christian book section. I found two books that I think will be so helpful for me right now. I have already almost finished one of them, and I want to share some of the things the author said that really spoke to my heart. The book is called Why by Anne Graham Lotz, and it's about trusting God in circumstances that you don't seem to understand. There are many quotes throughout the book, but one of them touched my heart so deeply that it has been my prayer each morning to remind me that I've given my concerns to Him and I'm trusting completely that His hand is in everything that has been happening lately:

"I lay my 'whys?' before Your Cross in worship kneeling,

my mind beyond all hope,

my heart beyond all feeling;

and worshipping, realize that I,

in knowing You,

don't need a 'why?'"

(Ruth Bell Graham).

God also spoke to me in something the author said, "God has given you a platform of suffering from which you can be a witness of His power and grace to those who are watching. Because, if we always feel good, and look good, and lead a good life...if our kids always behave, and our boss is always pleased, and our home is always orderly, and our friends are always available, and our bank account is always sufficient, and our car always starts, and our body always feels good...if we are patient, and kind, and thoughtful, and happy, and loving, others shrug - because they're capable of being that way too, when everything goes right. On the other hand...if we have a splitting headache, the kids are screaming, the phone is ringing, the boss is yelling, and the supper is burning, yet we are still patient, kind, thoughtful, happy, and loving...the world sits up and takes notice. The world knows that kind of behavior is not natural. It's supernatural. And the glory of Jesus is revealed in us!" Anyway, God has taught me so much through this book and I have been so at peace lately. Like I said earlier, I had a couple of tough days last week, but one thing that gave so much strength was a letter a friend wrote to me. It was so encouraging, and it reminded me of the strong woman of God that I seek to be. He also quoted Isaiah 40:31 at the end of the letter, and that verse gave me so much strength:

"But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles;

they will run and not grow weary,

they will walk and not be faint."

God is daily renewing my strength as He is drawing me closer to Him, and my heart yearns so much for time to be solely with Him. My room mates were gone to a race yesterday and today. So, I was alone and I popped in the new Jeremy Riddle CD that I just purchased, and I cranked up the volume and had the most amazing God time ever! I'll end with the words to this song on his CD Full Attention:

"May Your voice be louder

May Your voice be clearer than all the others,

than all the others
May Your face be dearer

May Your words be sweeter than all the others

Than all the others in my life
Please keep my eyes fixed on You

Please root my heart so deep in You

Keep me abiding that I

Oh, that I might bear fruit
May Your presence be truer

May Your presence be nearer than all the others,

than all the others
May Your light burn brighter

May Your love go deeper than all the others

Than all the others in my life"